I didn’t know the full story of Juneteenth until a few years ago. I’d heard of it, but never really understood it. That’s embarrassing to admit as someone who’s done inclusion work for nearly two decades. But the truth is, I stayed in my lane. My gay lane. I called myself an ally, but I wasn’t practicing intentional allyship. I was safe. Comfortable. Separate.

Like many people, I’ve spent a lot of my life “walking on eggshells”. It started as a kid with a father whose temper taught me to stay quiet to keep the peace. For some, especially those from marginalized groups, walking on eggshells becomes a way to stay small and safe. For others, it’s about cancel culture, a fear of getting it wrong.

When I was a little kid, my dad wouldn’t let me have a lemonade stand because he thought neighbors would think we needed money. I was raised to be independent, not ask for help, and not talk about personal problems. Can you relate?